DD8HW6 Sentence Variety and Style

Original: 

     Photographs are also a commonly used visual by Nutrition Educators, where ethical issues need to be considered. Editing a photograph by cropping out part of an image, or altering a photo in a way that it is different than it's original intent becomes an ethical issue if that alteration changes the context of the photo and the accompanying information. Photographs of healthy foods are often used to show examples of nutritious choices. Photographs are also used to show the differences in various cultures and their eating habits.  Culture plays a big role in nutritional health and photographs should avoid displaying any cultural stereotypes.

     Nutritionists and Nutrition educators often use tables to show a particular food, along with its serving size, calories, fat, carbohydrates and proteins.

Revised:

     Photographs are also a commonly used visual by Nutrition Educators that require ethical considerations. They are often used to represent examples of healthy and unhealthy food items. When photo editing techniques change the context of a photograph, and a persons' understanding of accompanying information, this is unethical. Examples of these changes include cropping out part of a photo, altering a photograph to distort the image, and changing the colors of a photo from color to a black and white. Photographs are also used to show the differences in various cultures and cultural eating habits. Culture plays a big role in nutritional health and photographs should avoid displaying any cultural stereotypes.

     Tables are often used by nutrition educators to display a type of food, amount of calories in that food, and categories of nutrients in that food, such as carbohydrates, proteins, and fats.   

Reflection:

• I noticed three of the six sentences started with the word "photographs" so I chose to vary the sentence opening in one of the sentences. I kept "photographs" as the opening in two of the sentences to show emphasis. by changing those sentences, which helped with the flow of my paragraph. 
• The Various Methods for Joining Ideas handout was useful and I edited some sentences using commas and conjunctions to to join ideas. 
• I started two of my paragraphs with the name of the visuals (graphic illustrations and photographs), but I didn't for the third.  I changed this and started that paragraph with Tables, to provide consistency and emphasis.